My daily routine is to get up at 6:30 AM go for a run and then fetch breakfast at Manas Tiffin center which is walkable distance to my house and the park. Today also I went to the tiffin center and entered the place which is not much crowded at 07:30 and started ordering the breakfast at the counter. Suddenly I hear a women’s voice excuse me “can’t you see? Are you blind?”, first I was confused and then I understood she was referring to me. Her voice is cold with anger and I did not understand why she is furious and I realized that when I entered the tiffin center I might have accidently brushed her with my hand as she is very near to the place where I came from. I showed my cane and I think she understood that I am really blind, she just told sorry and went off.
When she asked can’t you see? Are you blind? Unknowingly tears rolled in my eye’s and then my mind told I am not suppose to cry and suddenly tears stopped. I took my parcel and while I was leaving she came again and said that she is facing to the other side and talking to her friend so she did not realize that I cannot see. Then I understood that it was not my hand, leg or cane which touched her, it was my over sized fat jacket which might have brushed. Because if I am aware that I touched someone while I am moving in public I always make sure that I apologize, but here I did not even feel it to my senses.
How did I feel when she asked that question so rudely?
First I had an uneasy feeling about something, as if my heart is twisted and then a surge of anger burst into my blood. In the first instance my unconscious mind told me to say “fuck you can’t you see that I really cannot see” and my consciousness told not to talk anything. As soon as I came back home I gave a call to my sister and she cheered me up saying that today I enlightened a person with a lot of awareness on disability which even cheered me up. That’s true, controlling a minute of anger has made my day more cheerful.
PS…These kind of experiences has happened a lot of times while I was studying in college, but in Bangalore along with my cane I never was in some kind of situation like this, so got hot headed quickly.